To Be a Sunset Child

Me with a sunset:) Photo by Julia!

Sunsets are probably the most mediocre thing I could possibly write about. But I am going to anyway. Since I was a child, I have felt like sunsets were made for me. I know that is not at all true, and people everywhere see and love sunsets everyday, but I experience them deep in my soul. There is something about the oranges, the yellows, the pinks and purples, the blues and even the reds that help me realize I am alive. That this is all real. About two years ago now I was on a drive with my best friend back home and we came to a spot where the sunset hit the water just right. We had to stop. It was also around this time that I was beginning to figure out exactly what I wanted to go to college for. I had been waffling between science and music. Music and fashion. Fashion and science. I think deep down I knew it would be fashion, but I needed something to really show me that was the way to go. My friend and I sat there, talking about our job, the kids at school we liked or didn’t, what boys we thought were cute, and of course, just like every other junior in high school, what the fuck we wanted to do when we graduated. If my memory proves correct, it was here that I said I wanted to go into fashion merchandising. Under some pink and yellow sky, the future was born. It is crazy to think back and see all the pivotal moments I had while under a sunset. This one night though, I think reigns supreme.

If we go back to the beginning, where I say that I have been a lover of the setting sun since my early years, maybe I can break down why that is. I don’t personally remember this, but there is a story from a road trip with my family. My parents were up front, and my sister and I were buckled in the back. The sun was setting between islands in the Puget Sound, and I said “Mama, that is where Jesus lives.” as I pointed out at the sky. Although my faith may not be what it once was, I admire the confidence I had, and the security behind the observation. In some ways it is true I think, but now I just think it is true in a different way. Sunsets are an experience of love, of conversation, and of growth. How COOL is that? Something that seems so insignificant is really, in a way, the foundation of my youth. Another sunset memory… on one of my last days at home before I moved away for college, Ellie and I went on one of our routine Dairy Queen runs. We got our ice cream and headed back home, but on our way home drove up the hill past our house to try and catch the last bit of the sunset before it drifted down past eyesight. It was quick and it was not as dramatic of a view, but I still think about it. A silent moment with my little sister before our whole life became what are now memories. Sunsets are chapters in a book. They happen frequently and they happen quickly so you have to make sure to soak up every possible detail before you turn the page.

My mom encouraged me to be a sunset child. I think she just knows I love them so much. When I finally got my drivers license, I would go on long drives almost daily. It became an even bigger pattern when my mental health began to get questionable. That is when she started asking if I needed to see the sunset. If I need that time to think, reflect, and just be. It makes me emotional to think about now, because she still asks me if I have been to see the sun recently. It is almost like she knows how much I need it. This is where we get to the picture above. For spring break my three closest friends from school and I decided to get away to Cape Cod, just for a few nights. Don’t get me wrong, I was stoked to be going away with friends alone for the first time, but I was also excited to go to the beach, run on the sand, and just stand and look at the golden colored sky. I hope they read this and learn why exactly I was squealing like a toddler on the beach when I noticed that the clouds were turning pink. I was simply resetting. Rejuvenating one could say.

As I write this I feel sort of silly. I don’t want people to read this and think “no way could she really love a sunset this much” or “she is just telling a story”. However, I also shouldn’t feel apologetic for something I love and brings me clarity. So I will probably write about sunsets again, and I will continue to love them, and I will continue to be a sunset child. Because I want to. Because I can. So go look at the sunset, it might do you some good.

-Miss O